A goodbye

‘Phir le aaya, ye dil majboor… Kya kijiye…
Raas na aaya, rehna door… Kya kijiye…’

(This miserable heart has brought us here again. What can we do?
It didn’t like staying away. What can we do?)

These last few days at my college has been quite eventful, perhaps even more than 50% of the rest of the four years. And, as the sky turned violet with the setting sun, I realized that this college gave me a link with so many other people (don’t expect a number too high though, since class of 2016, for example, is only 124 folks) whom I wouldn’t have ever possibly met and connected with.

We have, as individuals and in groups, cursed the college many times over the years for various reasons – some very major ones and some minor ones – but this is one thing I cannot take away from the things it gave us. It gave me all these people, though I didn’t get along with all of them, over my stay of four years where so many lives connected on a single junction that was this college.

So now, when it is time to say goodbye, it is difficult to proceed through the sorrow of the loss of this connection. I will undoubtedly lose most of these connections, due to negligence if not something else, in future and they will leave a hole in me as time passes – only to be replaced, if that is even possible. It is a strange feeling to be grateful to something we took, as a personal responsibility, to blame for all the bad things that happened to us (though it was guilty several times).

But in the end, the words that really matter are only two.

Thank you.

A goodbye

‘Phir le aaya, ye dil majboor… Kya kijiye…
Raas na aaya, rehna door… Kya kijiye…’

(This miserable heart has brought us here again. What can we do?
It didn’t like staying away. What can we do?)

These last few days at my college has been quite eventful, perhaps even more than 50% of the rest of the four years. And, as the sky turned violet with the setting sun, I realized that this college gave me a link with so many other people (don’t expect a number too high though, since class of 2016, for example, is only 124 folks) whom I wouldn’t have ever possibly met and connected with.

We have, as individuals and in groups, cursed the college many times over the years for various reasons – some very major ones and some minor ones – but this is one thing I cannot take away from the things it gave us. It gave me all these people, though I didn’t get along with all of them, over my stay of four years where so many lives connected on a single junction that was this college.

So now, when it is time to say goodbye, it is difficult to proceed through the sorrow of the loss of this connection. I will undoubtedly lose most of these connections, due to negligence if not something else, in future and they will leave a hole in me as time passes – only to be replaced, if that is even possible. It is a strange feeling to be grateful to something we took, as a personal responsibility, to blame for all the bad things that happened to us (though it was guilty several times).

But in the end, the words that really matter are only two.

Thank you.

From Personal Experience… | 8

“I believe that we make the circumstances we face and are responsible for them being good and bad. But sometimes, despite everything being controlled, circumstances deserve to be blamed. They just slip out of the boundaries we define.”

And there would be two more ‘From Personal Experience…’ posts. I feel like I have started to use them a cop-out now.

From Personal Experience… | 7

“Far more worth than the words we speak are the words we don’t. These, sadly, end up being the connecting bridges that help make our spoken words in establishing a relationship within our pieces of sentences.

Know this that we want to share them but we can’t bear to come across as too open. Know that equally true is the fact that we are struggling to wait for you to ask the right questions for us to freely speak.

When people say that the right answers matter, it is silently implied that the right questions must be asked as well

.”

From Personal Experience… | 5

This one is hard to express properly. I hope I get it right.

“When you feel angry (at life) on behalf of someone who isn’t showing any negative emotion publicly, the result is a mix of inner realizations. It is a matter of pride to know that we care that deeply for someone, it is an embarrassing moment to feel like an idiot for making a baseless stand, it is horrifying to learn that we are not as strong as that person to be able to control ourselves and it is then our respect for that person increases because they realize that making a fuss won’t help in any way.”