Is it ever really possible to not be broken? To ever feel like you aren’t losing vital parts of yourself with every breath you take?
This won’t be a normal post. It is just that I need a place to speak my thoughts.
As I typed the words above, I realized I do not fear hateful comments here, for that is my advantage of being anonymous. On here, I can just be ignored.
Back to the topic I was typing for, if any. Is it really possible for us to always go through the life without feeling it drag it down? Doesn’t it seem to chip at you constantly, hitting your weak points when it can and creating new ones when it can’t?
“Do to others what you would like to be done with you.” “If you cannot do something good, do not do anything bad either.” These have been the words which with I have lived by all these years.
Can someone tell me, why they should matter in this world where everyone’s out for their own good? Where in those words, it has been preached that it would be better to simply do nothing rather than trying to do good? And I mean actual good, not those shades of good and bad where you realize that your actions are both good for some and bad for others?
On this cold night of being with people we care for and who love us in return, it feels depressing to not have one true person around me to whom I can truly turn to. For everyone is doing the best for their own good. Or they are lost in the lies they have told themselves about life that they are too blind to try.
Is it really so easy to ignore someone, a hundred someones in a different case even, who need help unless they make a noise? And is it really that easy to not care when they do?
The world favors the one who can make the loudest noise. But what about those whose screams have turned their throats so hoarse that they can’t even whisper now? Do they deserve to be forgotten – ignored because they weren’t the loudest? Do the tired no longer matter, who without any motivation left for doing so, simply have stopped trying to scream?
They too, I suspect, have chosen to turn deaf to others’ screams lest they be reminded of their failures. There is no cohesion in anything I speak now, nor do I have the slightest of interest in pulling any of me together. What I have spoken may just be mad ramblings or they may be my deepest frustrations expressed somewhere no one I know in real life would know about and bother me for.
Within 82 minutes, it would be Christmas here. If nothing else, take note of this: